This is a transcript of an article I wrote for Global Love Report, which was published on 5/27/20
Let’s face it. Those of us who are in the love business are magicians, right? Contrary to the belief that we have magic wands, our industry is part psychologist, therapist, and matchmaker. And in order to be successful, we need to understand what we can and can’t provide our clients. I know I have felt absolutely awful when I introduced a client to 6 very wonderful men and she only had chemistry with the one who didn’t want to see her again. I felt I had let her down, but in all fairness, I did a bang-up job finding suitable candidates based on her criteria!
Along the way, I’ve come to realize these truths:
1. We Can’t Promise Success
That’s right. We can’t because it would be duplicitous behavior. We can promise all the things we will do to try to find that special someone for our clients, but Cupid’s Bow needs to come into play and chemistry is also a major factor. Even with all things created wonderful and equal, and there is the bow and the chemistry-we can’t guarantee longevity. And anyone who does-well, a client should walk away. It’s false advertising.
2. We need to remember that not everyone is a perfect fit-for US
Not every person who contacts us is a match for us. The world works in wonderful and mysterious ways, but not all of us, like in romance, are a great fit for our brand or what our core base is. For me, I tend to attract those over 50 who are divorced or widowed and want to find their final romance. If someone hasn’t done the work on themselves, healed their hearts, gone through therapy and so on, even if we brought in their ideal dreamboat, it simply won’t work.
3. We need to give ourselves a break, too
We all want success. In our businesses, and in the lives of the clients we take on. But we also need to remember that we can’t promise perfection in anything we do. Life is imperfect. We are human, which means that we are indeed imperfect. I like to tell my clients that I don’t have all the answers, and I wish I did. I find that when I say that it releases me from feeling badly about something that didn’t work out as I had planned. I am hoping that as a result of Covid 19 that people will lighten up and see that being kind, honest and truthful are traits we seek in those we partner with and also hire.
4. Seek strong emotional connections with potential partners and referral sources
People buy from, and partner with companies and people who they feel they can trust and have built an emotional connection with. People remember how they felt they were treated after a particular experience with you. If something is less money and perhaps more appealing, and they have an emotional connection with you, they will undoubtedly buy yours because of the “loyalty” factor. It’s uber important to make that connection and have the experience be about them versus how YOU can benefit. People can spot a salesperson a mile away – don’t be that hard sell, but that kind, great listening empath they want to trust and build a relationship with.
5. Be transparent
I know this sounds like a no brainer but honesty is the best policy. After Covid 19 people will emerge wanting the real deal-not a facsimile or avatar. They want you and what you can provide for them. People buy out of need, scarcity and desire. Be the person who is kind, understanding, empathetic and honest. And let me know how that goes.